Monday, July 05, 2010

Julia Gillard's success is in her stars!

'The Australian Women's Weekly' is an iconic magazine-----even if it is monthly!

So you will be over-joyed that The Blowfly can report to you that once more 'The Weekly' is standard fare on the coffee and waiting room tables around Parliament House (the last time it was seen in the 'house' was when Bob Hawke was the PM.He liked to create the impression with female journalists that he was a SNAG. And Blanche fell for it!)

Our Ranga, bless her little Western Bulldogs socks, has made quite a few changes!

Firstly, she has appointed someone to unplug KRudd's 'black hole' and get the paper and decision-making processes of Government going again. Make no mistake she is an organised little biddy who is true to her star sign----Virgo!

All Virgoans have this attribute.They will organise everyone around them into 'one smooth-running unit'.

, she has restored the role of the Cabinet in the governance of the nation's affairs. Unlike KRudd she is not prone to thinking that she is the 'smartest one of all'. She is surrounded
largely by men. As a woman she knows that the best way to handle them is to massage their egos, listen intently to them, bat her eyelids, give them directions and let them do it their way. Unlike KRudd she will never humiliate anyone. Our Ranga will simply allow the men to come to her with their failures, express her forgiveness and let them 'go out to play' again---more motivated than ever to please her!

And, thirdly, she takes some time off!

She is a professional manager. She knows that you have to work smarter----not harder!

So this Sunday morning we find her and the 'first bloke' at their home in Altona relaxing.

It has been a heavy week for her active brain under that red hair. She has negotiated some new arrangements for the mining industry to settle that 'super profits tax' matter. She jetted up to Brisbane for a fund-raiser. And she has met with all her mandarins to understand what changes she needed to make to unblock the decision-making sewer (savor the analogy--- if you will!)

And this week she has to tackle the 'asylum-seeker' issue and put it to rest so she can call an election with a relatively clean slate.

Credit: Herald Sun
(look closely for The Blowfly on her right hand side where the hair meets collar)

As she sips her 'Tim-made' capuccino she flicks through 'The Australian Women's Weekly'. She is quite pleased at the 32 page Souvenir Issue with her smiling face adorning it. They have done a good job.

She stops briefly to understand why Pixie Skase feels 'sorry', and then onto read a couple of Richard Burton's love letters to Elizabeth Taylor and 'When the other woman is a man' article before stopping at her 'must read' on page 254--------her horoscope for July!

Her beady little eyes move straight to Virgo.

"A new beginning with an old friend or longstanding group involvement is clear this month as the eclipse near the 11th will help to answer complex questions and move you forward" reveals the first sentence.

From his position on her shoulder The Blowfly tunes into her innermost thoughts.

"Mmmmm" she thinks."An old friend. Who could that be? Oh I see---- it says 'OR' 'longstanding group involvement'. Probably 'Cabinet' and it's new beginning.Yep that's pretty right."

"The return of Saturn to your zone of income, debt, business, loans and investment is also a timely reminder about new responsibilities" says the next sentence.

She ponders for a second."Sounds like Wayne's area to me. I hope he has it all by the 'short and curlies'. Those miner's were pretty hard going---- but big pussy-cats when it came to the crunch!Just took a woman's touch."

"The freedom and expansion you want will come, but timing is everything" it goes on.

"Probably talking about the election here and my deferred move to The Lodge," she muses.She reads on.(The Blowfly was hoping for an election date here but could not pick up anything).

"To ignore the reality check that arrives in the final week in July would be a mistake. Manage that and Easter 2011 will be far more profitable."

"God this is more like a puzzle than a horoscope!..... Asylum seekers arrive......... I wonder if that is what it means?......... But what have they got to do with Easter 2010?........Maybe it means that if I call the election in the last week in July then I will enjoy my Easter next year.........Maybe it means that there is a flotilla of asylum-seeker boats going to arrive in the final week in July.God!.......God , what do I say God so much for?..... I'm an atheist!"

"Your concerns about how you appear are quite understandable,but it is time to relax about your reputation."

At this she giggles to herself.

"I don't think I can be too worried about my unmarried woman with a 'partner' supposedly running the country.........Bill Heffernan eat your heart out!.........they're a bit slow down Junee way.........much slower than out Altona way."

"But my appearance----now that's another thing!"

She calls to Tim. "Darling? Darling, what have you got planned for my hair this week?"

Inside your heart you know that, with a Virgoan, 'first things are always first'.

She laughs as she mentally recalls Bill Hayden's quip "that for all his years in Parliament, Andrew Peacock still seems to think that all he needs for political success is a good tailor and a hairdryer."

Asylum seekers, it appears, will get dealt with in their own good time.

The famous words of Bob Hawke permeate your head;"The women of Australia have been an under-utilised resource."

1 comment:

  1. A bit naughty but funny.

    "On a bitterly cold morning in Canberra, Kevvy is being chauffeured to Parliament House.
    It is so cold that Lake Burley Griffin has frozen over.

    As he jumps out of the Caprice, Kevvy looks over the Lake and notices that someone has "peed" on the ice and left a message ..."KEVVY SUCKS"

    Kevvy is enraged and orders ASIO to investigate with "no expenses spared" and to report within two weeks.

    Two weeks later, the head of ASIO reports to the PM and says...."Our investigation is over & I have three pieces of news for you....good news, bad news & terribly bad shocking news".

    Well says Kevvy, give me the good news.

    The head of ASIO says... "We spent $5 million dollars on the investigation and have come to a successful result".

    Well says Kevvy what's the bad news?

    The head of ASIO says, "The DNA testing shows the urine is Wayne Swann's".

    Kevvy is shocked beyond belief.

    Looking pale, Kevvy says, "And what is the terribly bad shocking news?"

    The ASIO chief replies.... "It's Julia Gillard's hand writing"."