Tuesday, April 06, 2010

Will Kevin Rudd's Easter prayers be answered?

This week The Blowfly has found himself thinking about religion. After all it is Easter and there is much 'goings-on' in that field.

The Blowfly was interested to see that after the Good Friday services the press reported the various themes enunciated by the Christian leaders in their respective services to the faithful.

The Anglican Archbishop of Sydney, Dr Peter Jensen, took the line that "atheism is as much of a religion as Christianity."

The Blowfly's minute brain was stretched to the limit by this assertion.

But The Blowfly was ahead of the pack as to how the 'powers-that-be' were thinking about religious issues over Easter.

Most of you would have seen the whistle-stop interviews on television with 'Our Kevvie' as he emerged from his Good Friday church service with his wife. What most of you did not see was The Blowfly sitting on his right shoulder.

Ever the opportunist The Blowfly had managed to latch onto the PM's sports coat and sit through the service with him. Not many of you will have had the pleasure of hearing the PM's prayers-----being the good little Christian Queenslander that he is!

During the first period for solitude and reflection this was the nature of his prayer.

"Dear God, thank you for being with me during these last few weeks whilst I try to pull my hospital plan together.Our hospitals are in a shambles, despite being managed by state Labor governments for over a decade------or is that because they were managed by state Labor governments over the years? Hospital bureaucrats have increased by 70% during that time and yet the number of hospital beds per thousand has dropped from 5 to 2.5.

With your help, God, our population is ageing and with all this wonderful new technology we have we can keep your charges alive longer.
This might be seen as your fault, God, if I can humbly put that perspective.And so I would like to think that you would come to our aid in helping me belt these State Premiers around the ears so we can fix 'your' system.

I know we have big problems overcoming the shortage of doctors and I know it is all linked to the shortage of aged care facilities but somehow you have to hold my hand here and give me the solutions.

And God, please help me with the public relations. There are some who are saying that if we can't run an 'insulation' hand-out nationally how would we be able to run a hospital system. This is an election year. The voters are watching us closely. Please help me!"

At this stage Therese gently elbows him and he stands like a humanoid for a hymn.

Hymn over, more religious rituals and now the PM is back to another moment of solitude and prayer.

"Continuing on God, thank you for the idea of appointing a Minister for Population. Tony Burke will be a good man for the job.He deals with all those red-necked farmers so well and they are the ones we need to have on side to be able to feed the increasing population. Gee, I hope they can come up with the goods! Ever since Peter Costello invited mothers and fathers to have 'one for the country' our birth-rate has been rising. But not fast enough to overcome all our skills shortages.

And God please help Stephen Conroy with his internet-filtering plan. He means well and we have to have something place before we get the National Broadband Network in place. Otherwise all that pornography will just get distributed at very high speed.

Also God can you please help the Pope.He needs you right now. We all take our eyes off the ball from time to time----just like I did with whaling and the Japanese!
And God can you please help the Broncos? I've forgiven that bastard, Wayne Bennett for moving to St George but many haven't. That's why Therese married me God! I'm full of forgiveness! Speaking of forgiveness, God, please help me to find a new job for Peter Garrett. I can't demote a rock star any further in an election year. There must be something he can do!"

Another nudge in the ribs from Therese and Kevvie's Good Friday moment of prayer and solitude concludes.

As he arises and walks from the church you hear him think to himself:" I wonder what sort of dick-head journalist will await me this morning? Sometimes I just yearn for the return of The Chaser or Norman Gunston!"

1 comment:

  1. Rudd and Abbott are both Christian it seems.

    Different sides of the same Christian Coin, or topically, the Easter Bunny.

    I wonder what eggs they will lay between now and the up and coming election?

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