Sunday, September 05, 2010

Just suppose you were Bob Katter

Albert Einstein used to conduct 'mind experiments'.

That was how he developed his Theory of Relativity.He imagined he was riding around our Universe sitting on a beam of light.

The Blowfly is no Einstein!

But he is capable of mind experiments! And this week he has been riding his own 'beam of light'. It has been a fascinating journey.

On Monday morning The Blowfly, using his enormous brain (one that would compare favorably to Tony Abbott's), got inside Bob Katter's brain.

It was a straightforward 'mind experiment' which started with a simple assertion followed by a question:

"Just suppose I was Bob Katter. What would that mean?"

Well it meant that I was an Independent MP from North Queensland. My seat would take in Mt Isa, Julia Creek, Charters Towers, Innisfail and Normanton.

My constituents would include miners, cane growers, cattle producers, banana growers, small businesses and fishermen.

The electorate covers 568,993 square km's.This is 8.3 times the size of Tasmania.

My electorate has been severely affected by the neo-liberal and economic rationalist policies of both the Coalition and Labor governments.

They don't value the interests of my constituents over 'their' constituents.

They think I am mad. One reason is because I wear a big hat. I like wearing my big hat because I need to get people's attention. Some say that they can 'see me coming'.

I am mad. I am fuming mad.Make no mistake! I am mad.

The National Party has mostly held the 'balance of power' in the Coalition Governments but they decided not to stand apart from the Liberals.They can't think for themselves. They have to be told what is good for their constituents by the Liberals who represent the city electorates.

Woolworths and Coles dominate the Australian food scene. They make their profits by screwing my constituents down. My constituents are often told that next year the farm-gate price will have to be 10% lower.Meanwhile, for example, banana growers in my electorate are 'helped' in this endeavour by imported bananas from the Philipines.This was allowed by a Coalition government.They are supposed to be our friends."With friends like these, who needs enemies?"

Sugar growers are also 'helped' by economic rationalist policies.

I quite liked Tony Windsor's maiden speech in the House when he said that the message that such policies 'sends to country communities is to proceed to your nearest major rural centre, go to the coast, go to Sydney or go to buggery.'

This is what I am up against. Dickheads from both sides of politics tell me what is good for the constituents of my electorate.

Journalists think I'm a tool. Politicians think I'm an idiot. And the National Party think I am down-right dangerous. They see me as the enemy. That is because if I get my way then more people will sit as Independents in the country areas. This will decimate them.

They looked forward to the release of my 'priority list' because they thought it was going to be a joke.

But when they saw it many Australians thought it was quite reasonable.

Capping Coles & Woolies market share at 22.5%,limiting their price mark-ups,targeting an ethanol component in fuel,bringing the dollar down to help exports and stimulate import-replacement industries and restricting the foreign ownership of farming land resonated with thinking Australians who are genuinely thinking about the future of our nation.

My constituents are so wide-spread that they are not going to benefit from fibre-optic cable personally because they will use wireless and satellites. But I reckon the NBN is going to be a great way to move our nation forward. I agree with Tony Windsor on that!

I've sat through the briefings of the last week and I don't like what I hear.

It seems to me that Tony Abbott tried to buy the election. He's a tricky bastard just like Howard was.

And it seems to me that the ALP did pretty well to get us through the GFC. Sure they might've spent a bit more than they needed but that was a lot better than not spending enough.

I didn't like the way that Kevin Rudd was rolled either. But I had heard the rumour-mill grinding out all those stories about how his office was becoming a bottle-neck for policy decisions.And the mining tax was a disaster!Whatever was he thinking?

I do have my doubts about climate change.But so do many others in the bush!They have seen droughts and floods. The hottest January in a century, the wettest spring in a century etc etc etc etc . But the fact is that it was that hot 100 years ago or that wet 100 years ago. That is what we experience in the bush---cycles!

I see that the Coalition boys are telling me that I wont be game to go back to my electorate if I support Labor.The don't know anything!My electorate expects that I will exploit this opportunity to the hilt. They don't want me to waste it by behaving like a National and just going along with the Libs. If I support the ALP I'll pick up a stack of votes next time from all those miners. It's a win-win!

But what is best for my electorate? That's the question.

I think that I'm going to support Julia.

She seems like the one most likely to play it straight with me.


So there you have it!

That's what's going on inside Katter's head.

Now for one more 'mind experiment'.Try this one out for size.

Just suppose that you were any one of the following:
  • a banana grower whose livelihood is threatened by imports
  • an Innisfail business person whose business has been substantially affected by floods
  • a homeless Aboriginal person who is trying to find work
  • a Methodist minister who is trying to help a family who had been evicted from their farm
  • a miner who has been unfairly dismissed from his job
  • a pregnant teenager who has been kicked out of her home by her parents because of her 'condition'
  • a vegetable grower who was recently told by 'your man from Woolies' that next year the farm gate price is going to be 10% lower and you have to become more efficient or get out
You decide that you will appeal to your local member for help.

Would you prefer to have Tony Abbott or Bob Katter as your local member?

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