Monday, August 06, 2012

If Kevin Rudd is the answer, what is the question?

Sometimes The Blowfly likes to keep his minute brain active.
An opportunity presented itself during the week to do just this.
A journalist was waxing lyrical in some tome or other about the perennial question of Kevin Rudd and his leadership aspirations and intentions.
The journalist posed the question: If Kevin Rudd is the answer, what is the question?
It caught The Blowfly’s eye and stimulated a brain cell.
In order to distract himself from the misleading statements and lies of Tony Abbott, the superciliousness of George Brandis , the light-weight and often-repeated clichés of Joe Hockey, the piercing shrill of Eric Abetz, the repeated propaganda of Greg Hunt and the totally annoying demeanor of Christopher Pyne yours truly turned his brain cell to this task.
It turns out there are many, many questions for which “Rudd” is the answer.
Here are just a few.
1.Which politician would we have to re-elect to ensure that the painful term “Gotta zip” becomes enshrined in the Australian vernacular?
2.Which politician would we need to see returned to power to ensure that Therese Rein becomes the most tolerant, long-suffering heroine-political wife of all time?
3.Which elected ALP member of the House of Representatives , upon assuming the mantle of Prime Minister again, could we safely predict would pay lip-service to the institution of the Cabinet as a governance body and when an excuse arose would again jettison it?
4. Which former Leader of the ALP might lose his seat at the next election if the Government is defeated?
5. Which Federal Labor MP is rumored to have undermined Julia Gillard during the last election thus ensuring that the ALP were forced into a hung Parliament and had to do a deal with the Greens and Independents to achieve office?
6. Which ALP former leader, if re-elected by the Party to lead them would ensure the resignation from senior positions of Swan, Conroy, Roxon, Gillard and Tony Burke and ensure that the Party entered a new realm of vitriolic, revengeful infighting?
7.Which former PM has Mark Latham described as ‘a foul-mouthed, ill-tempered egotist’?
8. Which so-called Christian ALP member of the Federal Parliament caused the administration of the Federal Government to become so dysfunctional that his colleagues successfully removed him?
9. Which former PM made a promise to support a state premier, Morris Iemma, in regards to privatization of the power generation industry in that state and then left him to rot?
10. Which Federal Labor MP has no factional base in the party room?
11. Which former leader of the Federal ALP has a leaked YouTube video doing the rounds that demonstrates his bad temper and petulance and would be a perfect election campaign TV advertisement for the Coalition to attack his reputation?
12. Which Federal MP would David Koch of Channel 7 most like to be re-elected as PM?
13. Which former MP of the ALP , if his Party elected him again would ensure the antipathy of the public servants who he pulled from their beds at unearthly hours and kept them waiting while he pontificated with others in meetings about his high level of knowledge on every topic imaginable?
14. Which Federal MP forced his Communications Minister to travel with him on his jet as the only time available to discuss a proposal for a national infrastructure project that has the potential to leap-frog this country out of its productivity dip?
15. Which former PM ,if entrusted with that role again, would be most at odds with Ronald Reagan’s famous delegation style and would be totally bemused by Reagan’s view that “hard work never killed anybody but, hell, why take the risk?”
16. Which of the following famous Queenslanders has been mooted as having aspirations to lead the ALP : Bob Katter, Kevin Rudd, Barnaby Joyce, Peter Slipper, Campbell Newman, Mal Brough,  Clive Palmer, Grant Kenny?
The Blowfly found it wasn’t that difficult to come up with these questions and he believes he has just touched the tip of the iceberg.
He does wonder why more journalists have not asked these questions because, if they did, The Blowfly believes much of the anticipation about Rudd’s return would evaporate.
The Blowfly recalls the words of Andrew Peacock: “Politics is a bit like a revolving door and you’ve got to make sure you’re in it.”
Except you Kevvie! Except you!
Gotta zip!

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