Monday, January 31, 2011

Tony Abbott finally acknowledges his baggage

Every so often The Blowfly is able to share a poignant moment with a politician.

In politics poignant moments are rare. Few come to mind.

Gough Whitlam shaking hands with Malcolm Fraser was one. Bob Hawke admitting he liked the grog too much was another. Malcolm Fraser conceding defeat to Bob Hawke because the drought had broken was memorable. Paul Keating showing Howard around The Lodge was also worthy. And John Howard being beaten in his own seat because he did not hand over to Costello was also a highlight in The Blowfly's perverse mind.

But today..............today it was Tony Abbott who was providing the poignant moment for The Blowfly.

I was able to be on Tony's shoulder when he went to see the NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) practitioner.

He'd been working up to it for some time.

You see Tony had realised that he was carrying a lot of baggage from the Howard era-----not to mention his Catholic education and his short stint training as a priest!

It was starting to get him down.

Because he was not Howard. Not Howard!
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Howard could pull things out of a hat. Tampa. The 'guns buyback'.The GST.The $10 billion to spend on the Murray Darling.

But unfortunately for Tony he could not even get things into a hat...............his ears got in the way!

And he realised that he had not had a constructive thought to take our nation forward for over a decade.

That didn't mean he wasn't playing to his strengths...........it's just that he had resolved with his God that he was going to be positive in 2011 and position himself as a 'statesman'..........much in the way that Howard had intended for himself but blew it when pride got in the way and he did not execute his succession plan.

Abbott has more at stake and there is more presure!

Abbott has Turnbull breathing down his neck. Imagine that! A personal fortune of over $140 million to fund his endeavours.

Tony just has his parliamentary salary and the royalties from his book.Not much joy there!

His thoughts were starting to come through loud and clear.

"Why does Tony Windsor think I'm such a dickhead?.............why did those Independents not fall victim to my charms?...............what is so beguiling about a red-haired slow-talking woman who sounds 'wooden'?...........why does she talk so slow?...............why doesn't Malcolm love me anymore?..........why am I getting hammered so much about my negative approach?...........it's not really negative ..............its just what Johnny taught me................and then Janette told me I would have her support if I didn't change anything......................and oh shit........... why is Laurie Oakes starting to be kinder to Julia?" His jaw dropped as he walked to his appointment.

She was a nice lady.......... the NLP practitioner. Well-groomed. Neat.

"So how can I help you Mr Abbott?" she asked.

"Well err ahh err", he stammered', "I haven't had a positive thought or idea since Julia became Prime Minister.I err ahh err want to become positive again................ like Malcolm is!"

And that was the poignant moment for The Blowfly!

He finally admitted what we all knew! He was a SNAG after all.

The words of Winston Churchill come into The Blowfly's mind: "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire"

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